Danya Jones Bowers
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(Mistake #1): Married  high school steady "Buck" Davison; we divorced after eight months-- he just didn't really want to be married.  Nearly lost my mind--it was a great shame in those days to divorce.  (Mistake #2).  Few years later, met a guy at Brookley AFB, 10 years older who neglected to tell me he’d been married twice before; talked me into a quickie marriage in Georgia. Very jealous, checked car mileage every time I used it (I never even thought of  running around). Our jobs at BAFB moved to Tinker AFB, Dell City OK.  Never rained, water rationing, no trees to speak of; wind blew all time; sand storms, snowed, tornadoes, and jumping tarantulas who traveled in pairs. I was so naive -- my pay was wired to a bank account my name was not on as well as the house and cars. 

After 4 years, got a divorce and went to Mobile. Rented a room from Bonnie Smith’s Mother.  William Wood's sister helped me get a job back at Brookley, in a warehouse. It got really cold in those warehouses down on the water, in winter.  Luckily, got a call one day for a secretarial job in an office and got it. Began dating a Brookley electrical engineer, aero engineer, mechanical engineer, an airman, a doctor, a lawyer, an architect, etc. and was out every night. Hardly ever slept or ate. It was a very good year!!!  Bonnie Smith and I shared an apartment and were always broke.  We’d pray somebody would ask us out to eat, otherwise it was popcorn or a pot of peas. Fell in love with the youngest, poorest guy I dated, Benjamin R. (Bob) Bowers (the aero engineer) :-) and after Brookley closed completely, I lived in Birmingham, Alabama with my parents and worked for IRS Collection Department where we had codes to use as we picked up phone such as “send a janitor to Room X” (there’s a guy here with a knife or gun), Social Security Administration, and VA hospital.  He lived with his parents for a year, then we married and lived there a year. He hated his job in the Air Force office at Hayes Aircraft shuffling paper and went on interviews at Eglin AFB here in Fort Walton Beach and for the Navy  in Jacksonville.  We moved to FWB and lived here 14  years, until he died in a motorhome accident at our waterfront dream house (we paid $98K for) which we only had the great pleasure of living in for one year.  He was 41, I was 38, and I came home from work and found him, and so it was the end of Camelot and my lover, buddy and best friend.  I was depressed and angry for 4 years (why was he taken when drunks living under the bridge were kept alive!)  He went a long way up the ladder fast and was a civil service GS15, since he was 34.  I always felt like a little nobody married to this guy with 3 degrees, extremely intelligent, who shot to the top. I worked at the base as a secretary. While working, managed to get in a year of college at night, played violin in local orchestra, painted in oils, and was active in League of Women Voters. Bob had two sons by previous marriage who lived with their mother and stepfather in Clearwater FL (every summer we became instant parents of two young boys who arrived badly needing haircuts, in ragged clothes and shoes and with holey underwear (all a ploy) and once, the youngest had a humongous tick on his head).  We  knocked ourselves out trying to give them a great time.

I lived at our house after Bob’s death for eight months, sleeping 2 hours a night, losing 30 lbs in six weeks, and went back to work after two weeks (just going through the motions of being normal); (Mistake #3), I finally decided to sell house (for $130K now worth about 800K or more) Wish I’d kept it -- would’ve made a great IRA. Afterward, discovered how strong and able I was and gained confidence, which I'd never had in my whole life. After selling house, had a new town home built, bought three rentals (1BR apt; a 2BR condo on Gulf; and a 3/2 house with a chain link fenced backyard).  I managed them myself, kept them all rented, listing them at Eglin AFB and Hurlburt AB housing offices only. (Mistake #4)  Wish I hadn’t sold them, years later, one by one, as that would be about $4K income a month now and they’d all be paid for! I worked  in civil service as a secretary/administrative assistant for 41 years (for the USAF primarily) and when the last office at Eglin I worked at got their budget request chopped by Congress 4 years ago locals offered incentives to those who had a lot of years and a "certain age" to retire.  I took it and ran, paying debts and happily retired in March  03.  I own my own home, a 2001 Lexus RX300 mid-size SUV, but had to sell my baby last year--a 91 Nissan 300ZX with 87K miles on it (zoom-zoom), in order to pay for a new roof -- 19 years old and Hurricane Katrina took lot of  shingles off. 

So far have no desire to get a job, and  it took 1.5 minutes to get used to being retired! I lost 42 lbs three summers ago and though fought it mightily, managed to find it again (arrrrrrgh). Still love sun, our snow white beaches, observing people, and finding humor wherever I can.  Still play fiddle with little orchestra/band group, after leaving local college orchestra I played with for 26 years; need to paint with oils again, take swimming lessons, learn to play golf, etc. Still have well developed sense of humor, great health, and am optimistic. Presently sharing my life with a 2-1/2 year old, 7.5 lb apricot poodle, named Zoe, who is great fun and very intelligent.  History:  My father died year before Bob. Mom is 90, living in a special home in Mobile, within 2 miles of my sister’s home, and has advanced Alzheimer's. 

Forgive, if not, it will only destroy YOU.  Be kind every chance you get. .  Dance as if no-one is watching, love as if you’ve never been hurt, and don’t forget to be grateful for everything, sometimes even unanswered prayers.


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